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Spouses' rights (huquq al-zawjayn)

حقوق الزوجين

The rights of husband and wife as Sheikh Omar Abdelkafy sets them out in two lessons of his series on rights: the wife's duties toward her husband and the husband's duties toward his wife, with affection, mercy and good companionship.

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At a glance

Region
Global / Diaspora
Review

Contested: This record includes matters on which scholars differ. The speaker's views are labelled as his, and other views are marked where no cited source yet exists.

Family, marriage and kinship

Summary

Sheikh Omar Abdelkafy sets out the rights of husband and wife in two lessons of his series on rights: the husband's rights over his wife in the first, and the wife's rights over her husband in the second. 1 2

The husband's rights over his wife

The Sheikh says the husband's rights over his wife are several points, and that he covered six of them in the previous lesson (needs_source: the number is spoken once in the transcript). 3 One of these points is that a wife should adorn herself for her husband and be ready for him. 4 He recounts a saying that calls the husband "her paradise and her fire"; the transcript does not make his explanation clear (needs_source). 5 He warns that a wife may forget her husband's kindness when she sees something she dislikes, and cites a saying to that effect. 6 He recounts that a wife who leaves her husband's home without his permission is cursed by the angels until she returns. 7 He says the Prophet ﷺ knew from Aisha's manner of swearing whether she was pleased or angry. 8 He describes the good wife as one who pleases her husband when he looks at her, obeys when he asks, and guards herself and his property when he is away. 9 He says this does not mean the wife must be a beauty queen, an actress or a performer. 10 He cites a saying that counts loving and fertile wives among the best of women. 11 He advises that a wife should not present her husband with a list of complaints when he comes home from work, because he wants a kind word and a gentle smile. 12 13 He says a husband wants to see a smile on his wife's face, and recounts the story of Umm Sulaym, who hid the death of her son from her husband until he had eaten. 14 He counts it among the gravest betrayals for one spouse to reveal what passes between them (needs_source: the subject of the disclosure is unclear in the transcript). 15 He says the wife must guard her children and their upbringing, and fear God in regard to her husband. 16 He says kindness to the husband is shown in kind words, service and care. 17 He advises that a wife should not admit into her husband's home anyone he dislikes. 18

The wife's rights over her husband

The Sheikh begins with the verse that says God created spouses from among ourselves so that they might find rest in each other and set affection and mercy between them. The verse on the creation of spouses, affection and mercy 19 20 He treats the wife as a sign of God to be treated with respect and affection. 21 He distinguishes affection from mercy, placing affection in the days of engagement, when each spouse adorns themselves for the other. 22 23 He refers to the verse that describes spouses as garments for each other, and explains the garment as closeness and intimacy. The verse describing spouses as garments for each other 24 He recounts that the Prophet drank from the place where Aisha had drunk, and took food from the place she had bitten. 25 22 He says the Prophet played with his family and raced them, and helped in the work of the house. 26 27 28 He explains the verse that likens the wife to a tilled field: as a farmer tends his land with good seed, water and care, so the husband tends his wife. The verse that likens the wife to a tilled field 29 30 He names good companionship as the first general right and says that among its requirements is that the husband not overlook his wife's feelings. Living with a spouse in kindness 31 He holds that a wife is not obliged to serve her husband's mother, and that she should treat her well. 32 33 He warns against suspicion and spying on the wife, and cites Jacob's fear for his son Joseph. The verse on Jacob's fear for his son 34 35 He recounts that when the Prophet returned from a journey he did not come to his household at night without warning. 36 He warns against a husband belittling his wife in front of her family. 37 He recounts that Aisha, in jealousy, broke a dish of food, and that the Prophet rebuked her gently. 38 He cites the verse on the Prophet's gentleness and holds that correcting a wife should be done gently. The verse on the Prophet's gentleness 39 40 He describes the good wife as one who guards her home and children, so that the house is orderly and the children clean. 41 He counts it among the wife's rights that her husband teach her her religion, and that she hear from scholars and learn. 42 43

From the lectures: justice, work and manner of treatment

The speaker says that rights between spouses run in both directions and that each has a right over the other 49 (needs_source: the sentence is unclear in the transcript). He counts justice as "the second of the rights" and includes kind treatment within it 50 (needs_source: the rest of the sentence is unclear). He says a husband must protect his wife's feelings or be counted among the unjust 51. The views below on a wife's work, her earnings, correction and obedience are contested among scholars; they are shown as the speaker's own views.

The speaker refers to a Qur'anic verse on a believer's choice once God and His Messenger have decided, but he does not name the sura in the recording, so it is not linked (needs_source: 52). A reference to a verse at 53 is likewise not linked, because the transcript does not name it (needs_source).

From the lecture series Al Naba Al Safi: maintenance and justice between spouses

He describes a husband who spends on his own pleasures and withholds from his wife and children, and says that the outcome is resentment and injustice. 54 He cites a sacred saying on God forbidding injustice to Himself, and says that marriage becomes obligatory or forbidden depending on the situation of each spouse. 55 He describes a husband who wrongs his wife, and a wife who seeks divorce after years of delay in court, and calls the husband's failure to take responsibility a calamity. 56

Kind words before family and children

The Sheikh criticises a wife who belittles her husband before their children, and says that she falls short in her responsibility and that her daughters will copy her. 57 He cites a verse saying that God created spouses so that each might find rest in the other and set affection and mercy between them, and counts these three as the supports of a Muslim home (needs_source: the sura is not named in the recording). 58

Patience and mutual support in hardship

The Sheikh says that spouses should build a store of goodwill to draw on in times of crisis, and he criticises a spouse who waits for the other's mistake. 59 He says that a wife can improve her marriage by improving her relationship with God, and that the same holds for a husband. 60 A woman asks about a husband who is heavily pressed and fears for their time and the household's money; the Sheikh tells her not to despair and not to grieve, but to trust God. 61 He asks husbands and wives to ask what the Prophet would have done, rather than react harshly. 62

Secrets and spying between spouses

He recounts a hadith that one of the gravest betrayals is for a spouse to pass on the private matters of the other, and says this applies to husbands as much as to wives. 63 He advises that a husband should guard his wife's secrets and honour, and be cheerful at home rather than frowning because of his work, and he says that the Prophet was kind to his family. 64 He cites the Qur'anic prohibition of spying and a saying of the scholars that when doubt arises one should not investigate (needs_source: the sura is not named in the recording). 65 He mentions a hadith on the disclosure of a secret between spouses, and gives the wives of Noah and Lot as examples of disclosing a secret (needs_source: the hadith is not named in the recording). 66

Opinions on the question

First opinion · Sunni tradition (the museum's frame) · Sunni view: not yet sourcedMain reference

not yet sourced.
More opinions (11)

speaker's view (Omar Abdelkafy) viewOther opinion

He says that a wife's work out of necessity differs from work without necessity, and that being away from home for seven or eight hours or more requires a ruling the transcript does not make clear 44 (needs_source: partly unclear). He warns a husband against taking from his wife's salary 45 (needs_source: partly unclear).

academic view: not yet sourced viewSecondary opinion

not yet sourced.

other view: not yet sourced viewOther opinion

not yet sourced.

Sunni tradition (the museum's frame) · Sunni view: not yet sourcedMain reference

not yet sourced.

speaker's view (Omar Abdelkafy) viewOther opinion

He says "do not strike the face" and calls it forbidden 46 (needs_source: the sentence is partly unclear and its context needs re-listening).

academic view: not yet sourced viewSecondary opinion

not yet sourced.

other view: not yet sourced viewOther opinion

not yet sourced.

Sunni tradition (the museum's frame) · Sunni view: not yet sourcedMain reference

not yet sourced.

speaker's view (Omar Abdelkafy) viewOther opinion

He names good hearing and obedience to the husband 47, and says that a wife leaving her husband's house in this manner is forbidden 48 (needs_source: the rest of the sentence is unclear).

academic view: not yet sourced viewSecondary opinion

not yet sourced.

other view: not yet sourced viewOther opinion

not yet sourced.

People and things also explored

Taj Mahal· Abawan (the two parents)· Justice among co-wives· Obstructing a marriage (adl): the guardian and the husband· Fleshy growth in the wife's womb and the right to annul (afal)· Ahl al-Nasab (the kin by descent, and who counts as kin in bequests and endowments)· Akdariyya (a named inheritance case)· Brother (full, paternal and maternal) in law

Sources

  1. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:00:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  2. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:03:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  3. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:02:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  4. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:02:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  5. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:06:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  6. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:05:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  7. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:06:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  8. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:07:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  9. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:09:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  10. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:09:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  11. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:13:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  12. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:14:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  13. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:17:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  14. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:16:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  15. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:18:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  16. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:22:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  17. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:22:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  18. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:23:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  19. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:03:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  20. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:04:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  21. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:04:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  22. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:05:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  23. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:06:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  24. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:08:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  25. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:05:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  26. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:08:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  27. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:13:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  28. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:13:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  29. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:10:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  30. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:10:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  31. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:17:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  32. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:17:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  33. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:18:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  34. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:19:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  35. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:19:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  36. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:20:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  37. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:22:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  38. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:23:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  39. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:24:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  40. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:24:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  41. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:28:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  42. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:44:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  43. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:45:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  44. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:11:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  45. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:11:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  46. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:29:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  47. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:36:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  48. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:42:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  49. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:33:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  50. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:19:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  51. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:23:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  52. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 1, at 00:29:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  53. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Hoquq, episode 2, at 00:37:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  54. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Naba Al Safi, episode 2, at 00:27:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  55. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Naba Al Safi, episode 2, at 00:28:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  56. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Naba Al Safi, episode 2, at 00:28:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  57. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Naba Al Safi, episode 2, at 00:11:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  58. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Naba Al Safi, episode 9, at 00:33:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  59. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Naba Al Safi, episode 6, at 00:34:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  60. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Naba Al Safi, episode 10, at 00:39:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  61. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Naba Al Safi, episode 13, at 00:41:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  62. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Naba Al Safi, episode 23, at 00:41:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  63. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Naba Al Safi, episode 9, at 00:22:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  64. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Naba Al Safi, episode 15, at 00:21:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  65. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Naba Al Safi, episode 9, at 00:38:30 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
  66. Assabile archive of Omar Abdelkafy's lectures (audio and video) , Al Naba Al Safi, episode 20, at 00:08:00 · Listen at the archive (opens the audio at this time)
Cite this page

islam.museum contributors. “Spouses' rights (huquq al-zawjayn)”. islam.museum, https://islam.museum/en/concept/huquq-al-zawjayn/. CC BY-SA 4.0. Last updated 2026-10-26.

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